


Lady Parts

by InkyNix



Category: Hellsing
Genre: F/M, Fluff, girlycard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2019-01-09 06:36:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12270900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkyNix/pseuds/InkyNix
Summary: Integra was just doing some daily paperwork when Alucard strided into her office with a new body and a wide grin. Exactly why did her vampire have the body of a young girl?





	Lady Parts

Integra was pretty sure she had Alucard figured out at this point. His quirks, his morals, his strengths and weaknesses. After years of becoming numb to his shenanigans, she was pretty sure that nothing could surprise her anymore.

That is, until, he walked into her office with a womanly body.

“Do you like it?” Alucard asks as he- she? They?- twirls around in a circle, his coat billowing and his hair making a graceful circle, “You’re speechless, I know.”

“Why…?” Integra stares at him, trying to figure out his motives. It could be related to sex- hell, it was usually related to sex. But at the same time, it could just be that her vampire was bored, and wanted something to spice up the day. Honestly if he wanted to morph his body instead of terrifying the medical staff with floating mops, she would gladly accept the former.

“I used to use this form rather regularly in the 40s. I realized you’d never seen it, and I wanted your input.” Alucard strides forward before leaning on her desk, flashing a fang-filled grin, “Rather stunning, don’t you think?”

Integra stares at him for a moment before responding. “You’re… rather cute.”

This seems to take Alucard aback, as he blinks. “Beg pardon?”

“I assume you’re trying to look like an attractive woman?” Integra leans back in her chair, “You give off more of the vibe of a twelve-year-old girl, to be frank.”

Alucard looks, frankly, insulted. “Are you calling me childish?”

“I said you look like a child, you melodramatic fool.” Integra rolls her eyes, “Those bangs have not been in style on adults for a very long time. And your voice is rather squeaky.”

She fights back a smirk as Alucard flushes, his eyes flashing. If it was a game he wanted, it was a game he’d get. And Integra had gotten very good at this game.

“I’ll have you know that I was fawned over back when I used this form regularly.” Alucard huffs, narrowing his eyes. His big, dewy, child-like eyes. “Men were lining up to share a bed with me.”

“I’m pretty sure those men were not men you wanted to be acquainted with. Dirty people.”

“They were not interested in that.”

“Of course, because you were ‘so mature’.”

Alucard is red now, and just like she thought, he looks like he was about to start pouting and stamping his feet. Of course he would never actually do that, he would never stoop so low, but he looked like it. Which only added to the cute exterior he was presenting to her.

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” Alucard crosses his arms and glares at her.

“Immensely.” Integra admits, “It’s not every day my vampire comes into my office with such a unique form. The least I could do is give him some grief about his cute little hat.”

Alucard finally smirks. “Oh? Than should I say the same about yours?”

Integra freezes and Alucard goes on. “Ah yes, that cute little hat you wear whenever you’re trying to get the round table to take you seriously. It almost looks like a sailboat on your head!”

“I’ll have you know that it’s quite fashionable.” Integra knows better than to fall for this, but his smirk was so irritating…

“Oh really? Is that why I see the teenagers staring at you when you wear it? Because they’re so jealous of your ‘hip and radical style’?”

“Those words haven’t been in style since the 80s, brush up on your pop culture, you old man.”

“How do you know that they’re not just coming back in style? I could be way ahead of you, if your hat has anything to say about it.”

“Because you’re currently dressed as a sailor girl who quite enjoyed her recent Russian vacation.”

They were at an impasse, staring each other down, waiting for the other to make another sarcastic comment and continue the game. No one seemed eager to, however, and it’s Alucard who gets bored first, chuckling. “Perhaps we can both agree that neither of us get out enough to be any judge of being ‘cool’.”

Integra sighs. “I suppose we can.” She says, getting up from behind her desk and walking over to a loveseat she had set out, specifically for when her vampire wanted attention. She sits down and waits.

Sure enough, Alucard strides over, happy as a clam as he settles against her chest, a purr rising from him. Integra raises an eyebrow when she realizes that he’s not changing back to his usual form.

To his credit, Alucard seems to pick up on her curiosity, looking up at her. “Call me nostalgic. I quite enjoyed my time with this form. Nazis are rather fun to kill, especially when they’re so shocked that it’s a woman ending their life.”

“I will admit that you’re much lighter this way.” Integra starts playing with his hair. Usually when his hair was this long it meant that he’d been unlocking his power, which meant he was killing something. Now though, he was perfectly mellowed out against her, his glyphs weren’t even shimmering. She quite liked moments like these. “Dare I say you’re more manageable as a woman.”

“I thought I was a twelve-year-old girl, master?” She feels him smirk.

“Don’t push it.” She flicks him in the forehead and he snickers before settling back down, “What made you decide to switch back?”

“Honestly? Nobody would take me seriously. Even my master at the time tended to forget what I was capable of. Couple that with…those jokes, and I decided to take the form of a man again.” He says.

Integra hums in understanding. She completely understood, being mocked as a woman and being mocked for something beyond your control, be it being a vampire with a certain name or a girl far too young to have as much power as she did. And Alucard knew that; perhaps that’s why she was being presented with this form in the first place? Alucard did have rather odd ways of showing his trust, ways that made perfect sense when they were explained.

“I don’t take this form often anymore,” Alucard looks up at her with a sleepy grin, “But I thought my master deserved the opportunity. I’m a pretty girl, am I not?”

“Yes, Alucard.” Integra sighs and pets his hair, making him purr, “You’re a very pretty girl.”


End file.
